Ugh. It's been one of those days. You know the kind I mean, right? First of all, it's Monday. I was awakened much too early this morning by the phone. Naturally, it was a wrong number. I'm out of toothpaste. Even though I got up on time, I was VERY LATE in getting out of the house; the lateness carried over and permeated my entire day. I was stressed out at preschool, trying to do too many things at once and handle too much responsibility. I almost got hit three times driving to the community college for an observation. I had to leave the observation, which I was truly interested in, early in order to get to class on time. I DIDN'T EVEN MAKE IT TO CLASS ON TIME, due to construction, two busses (sp?!?!) and two wrong turns. For the first time ever, I had the displeasure of walking in to classs and slinking into my front-row seat while the prof was talking. Nice job, MMSG. Urgh. Doors were locked when they shouldn't have been; I forgot my gloves; I didn't have time to eat anything until just NOW; I almost ran out of gas and spent way too much filling up the tank; computer repair guy was supposed to come fix my keyboard this afternoon and so far, he hasn't even bothered to show up; I have a test on Wednesday which I haven't studied for and I also have a paper due which I haven't even started....
You get the picture. It's just been one of those days. The days that make me hiss at people (yes. I'm totally serious here. Ask the Lil' Bro. He's been on the receiving end of an awful lot of hissing lately. Sorry, Lil Bro!). The days that make me want to throw things. The days that make want to crawl in bed with a long book and say "Heck with you, you big stinky world! I DON'T want to deal with you anymore!"
Sidebar: Heh. As I'm sitting here griping, I'm reminded of a line from Notting Hill (*confession* This is currently one of my FAVORITE MOVIES EVER. Something about it...maybe it's Hugh Grant's [who plays William] adorable accent....just makes me go weak at the knees. I cry every time I watch it. Pathetic, I know...*sigh*)...
Spike: You couldn't help me with an incredibly important decision, now, could you?
William: This isn't important in comparison to, say, the decision over whether or not we should cancel Third World countries' debt, now, is it?
.....
William (to Anna): Can't we just laugh about all this? I mean, seriously, in the hugh sweep of things, this is nothing! This stuff doesn't actually matter!
Spike (to Anna): What he's going to say next is that there are starving children in the Sudan.
William (to Anna): Well, there are! And this is nothing compared to that!
So yeah. I know. I know I know I KNOW!!! So maybe my problems are inconsequential, in the grand scheme of things. And I know that, gosh darn it! I really do!! I really DON'T want to be reminded of it again, thank you very much; I'd much rather wallow in my own self-pity and moan some more. Leave me alone, Hugh. *glares*
And yet. Somehow, after He rolls his eyes and shakes His head, God always reaches down and touches my heart and helps me get myself back on track, and refocus my thoughts and attitude. Today He did so through a song, as He often seems to do with me when I'm in moods like this. And it wasn't a new song. It was a song I've heard a bazillion times in my life; a song that, admittedly, I sometimes grow tired of and change the station when it comes on, looking for something newer or more interesting. But today, it spoke to me in a way I didn't expect.
It was "How Great is Our God" (<-- sung here by Hillsong. This video gave me goosebumps!)
It really just jolted me out of my I'd-really-like-to-pick-up-my-Statistics-textbook-and-chuck-it-at-this-nincompoop-who's-STILL-tailgating-me-cuz-maybe-THAT-would-get-him-off-my-butt thoughts and made me think.
How great IS our God? How incredible is it that we have a God who loves us even when we're not loving Him, when we're not loving life, when we're not loving all the blessings He's given us? How amazing is it that our God will forgive us for our grumpy, selfish, textbook-throwing thoughts and welcome us back with open arms? How wonderful is it to know that even when I'm having a bad day, God is in control? How blessed are we to have a God this great?!
(Funny how on bad days, everyday knowledge often feels like stunning epiphanies [sp?]).
